I look at other blogs and wonder how people twirl their words around and around to create such beautiful entries. It all looks so difficult to me! My blog, however, can be described as simple and straightforward. Pretty much the same as I am in real life. Precise. To the point.
This free-spirited nature of mine, coupled with my utterly rebellious nature, put me in a tight spot one time too many. The earlier incidents of rebellion I do not remember, perhaps because they were too small and insignificant. But as I grew older, they were no longer far and few in between. My rebel spirit grew stronger and stronger, until there came a point where I couldnt care less for other people's feelings. My speech, which was witty at one point of time, though a bit outspoken, became rude, brash and uncivilised. People thought of me to be heartless and cold.
Then something happened that sucked out all these horrible things out of me. I wanted people to know me, the real me. I wanted them to know that I was warm, kind, helpful and loving. I was sick of being labelled as uncouth.
I moved over to the next class with an unconscious resolve to show myself truly. No pretense. The transition was smooth, easy and hugely noticed by my classmates. I was popular still, but now for all the right reasons.
It has been many years since this identity crisis. I am still a rebel at heart. I still speak my mind. But there is a certain softness about it all. My classmates remember me as a friendly person who would go out of the way to help people. And that is the beauty of it. To know that you make people happy.
Now there's something strange here. The time period when I was a girl with two horns and a spiked tail is fuzzy in my mind. I dont really remember anything worthwhile from that duration. But things that happened years earlier, even when I was 3-4 years old, are so clear in my mind.